I've been trying to nail down why some certain experiences seem to keep happening, almost as if I'm in my own version of "Groundhog Day" and we just keep going through the same things again and again...destined to live out our lives in a movie that skips! I've been praying to try and figure it out, and thinking about it constantly. Well, yesterday, this scripture, well, actually a PHRASE in this scripture, jumped out at me.
" 20 Wherefore, ye must press forward with a steadfastness in Christ, having a perfect brightness of hope, and a love of God and of all men. Wherefore, if ye shall press forward, feasting upon the word of Christ, and endure to the end, behold, thus saith the Father: Ye shall have eternal life." - 2 nephi 31:20
It was as if those four words jumped off and bit me in the nose. I don't think anyone likes to think that they don't love all men, and I think maybe, deep down, I do. But there have been some individuals that I have more than struggled with, and I haven't been able to get over it. It's like Heavenly Father was saying, k- here's your problem...fix it.
It is a bit ironic because growing up, I drove my parents nuts because people would do stuff to hurt us, or me, and I would defend them to the death trying to see where they came from. I never held a grudge...seriously! Forgiveness was easy. But somewhere between my junior year and now that changed...and here I am, a grown woman holding petty feelings over things that in the grand scheme of things matter next to nothing. Bryan says the answers to all my problems are in the scriptures...I am sure he's right...but I'm not one who is good at randomly opening my scriptures to some unspecified place. Lack of faith, I know. But , if any of you have any brilliant ideas on where I can begin my quest, bring it on :)
3 comments:
Its amazing how scriptures we hear over and over again can teach us some many different things at different times in our lives. It is a challenge to love ALL men and its much easier said than done. But you are so good at looking for the good in people.
I've known you for a long time dude, and you are WAY too hard on yourself, the more people I meet, especially in the workplaces (and heaven knows I have seen A LOT of workplaces), the more I am learning that my family is on the higher tier of basic good things, (being good, thinking good, acting good etc.) and that certainly includes you!
I definitely feel like I am living ground hog day when I am pregnant. I know each morning no matter what I will wake up and throw up. I will feel sick all day and start over- it can be very depleting.
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